10 new psychological findings about happiness
In summary: Many people have had this experience. As their positions grow, their expectations are getting higher and higher. Past efforts no longer bring fame and wealth to happiness.
Professor Martin Seligman said that this is the happiness treadmill at work. If happiness is equal to wealth and fame, we must have more, otherwise we will not feel happy psychologically.
1. Many people have experienced this kind of experience. When the position is elevated, the expectations are getting higher and higher. Past efforts have brought fame and wealth to no longer bring happiness.
Professor Martin Seligman said that this is the happiness treadmill at work. If happiness is equal to wealth and fame, we must have more, otherwise we will not feel happiness.
Without this “treadmill”, the people in fortune should be happier than ordinary people.
As a result of Professor Martin Seligman’s argument, ordinary people are happier than those who are noble.
Studies have found that fortunate things and high achievements do not bring long-term happiness, only short-term effects.
2. Happiness is not a temporary pleasure. Some people ask, “How can I be happy?
“For Professor Martin Seligman, this is a wrong question, because if we cannot distinguish between pleasure and satisfaction, we will rely entirely on shortcuts to find the joy that is easily available in life.
Pleasure is immediate, it comes from the senses, and it is temporary.
Once the external stimuli disappear, they quickly disappear, and we gradually have these habituation effects, which will require stronger and more stimuli in the future to bring the same level of pleasure.
We all know that it is not temporary happiness. Real happiness must come from our own efforts.
However, humans have invented many shortcuts for temporary sensory pleasures: drugs, chocolate, sensuality, shopping, and television.
3. Money cannot buy happiness. In fact, our views on money affect our happiness more than money itself.
According to Professor Seligman’s research, among all classes, the more value-oriented people are, the more dissatisfied they are with his income and the more dissatisfied with his life.
Professor Seligman’s team conducted a survey of life satisfaction in more than 40 countries and found that: in countries with strong purchasing power, people’s life acceptance is also high; once the national income exceeds $ 8,000 per capita, this correlation begins to disappear, and the increase in wealth cannotContinue to increase life satisfaction.
Money cannot buy happiness. In the second half of the 20th century, changes in the purchasing power of rich countries also brought us the same message: the actual purchasing power of the United States, France, and Japan has doubled, but life has not changed.
4. Happiness comes from advantages and virtues. Happiness comes from your own advantages and virtues. Only the happiness you get through your own efforts can have a true feeling of happiness.
Doing things that are pleasing to the senses, such as chatting with friends, watching movies, and scoring with the feeling of doing good, are overshadowed.
When we naturally help others, we all have a happy day.
Strengths and virtues are positive personality traits that bring positive feelings and satisfaction.
The optimistic person is worried that the current difficulties are interpreted as temporary, he has control, and only in this situation; on the contrary, the pessimistic person thinks that his difficulties will not be escaped in a lifetime, and it is unluckyOne after the other, and I can’t stop it.
Optimism is just one of more than twenty attributes that make you happier.
Harvard’s Professor George Valiente conducts research on “mature defense”. Maturity includes: altruistic behavior, the ability to delay gratification, full of expectations for the future, and a sense of humor.
“Wind-knowing grass, loyal ministers in troubled times”, can even sharpen a person’s character in a disaster.
5. Happiness is highly hereditary. We are willing to believe that once you work hard, every emotional state and every personality trait can be improved. Of course, it also includes positive emotions such as optimism that support happiness. Only in this way, it is relatively weak.Talent has the confidence to stand up.
More than 40 years ago, when Seligman entered the field of psychology and began to study, the idea that “people can be changed” has been hanging over the psychology community.
However, in the 1980s, personality studies of twins and adopted children began to appear. The above was called a failure, and there is no possibility of a comeback.
Identical twins have more psychological traits than fraternal twins. The adopted children’s personality traits are more like their biological parents than their adoptive parents. There are more than a hundred research reports of this kind, and they all show the same thing: about 50Personality traits are genetically determined.
However, high heritability does not mean that it cannot be changed. Some genetic traits (such as sexual orientation and weight) are immutable. Other genetic traits, such as pessimism and fear, can be changed.
6, happiness is to obtain satisfaction. The biggest benefit of separating pleasure and satisfaction is that although half of the people cannot achieve positive emotional happiness, they still get happiness because they have satisfaction.
Satisfaction cannot be obtained from physical pleasure, nor from drug use or any shortcut.
Only after noble behavior is done will it naturally occur.
Pleasure is sensory and emotional, and satisfaction comes from exerting personal strengths and virtues.
Getting satisfaction is actually quite simple.
It is to do something that is challenging and requires technology; to focus on; to have a clear goal; to get immediate feedback; you should be deeply involved in the thing you are dealing with; you have the feeling of being able to control;Time has stagnated.
7. Happiness but not stupid. Many evidences show that although depressed people are more sad, they are more correct.
Depressed people are more practical, and they can more accurately judge how much talent they have; while people with happiness generally evaluate their ability more than others judge him.Although it is easy to have “happy but stupid” accusations inside the coaxial.
But it turned out to be untenable.
People with happiness remember more happy things. They remember even more than they actually happen. They often forget bad experiences.
In contrast, depressed people have good memories of both events.
Happiness people think that if they succeed, they are of course proof of their ability; if they fail, they believe that failure will soon pass, and only because of bad luck.
Much of the evidence gathered by Utah State University professor Aspinwall shows that happy people make important decisions better than unhappy people.
8, happy people are more willing to altruistic happy people have a common characteristic is altruistic behavior.
Many people may think that an unhappy person is more sympathetic to the pain of others, because he has felt it, which should be more conducive to his behavior.
Experimental results show that happy adults and children are more compassionate and are more willing to donate money to those in need.
In other words, happy people are more likely to be altruistic.
When we are happy, we will not focus on ourselves, we will like others more, and even willing to share our good luck with strangers.
When we are down, we don’t trust others, we become very introverted, and we focus on defending our needs.
9. Marriage is a guarantee of eternal happiness. Marriage is much more relevant than money and happiness.
Empirical data support that marriage is a guarantee of eternal happiness.
The National Center for Public Opinion Research in the United States surveyed 35,000 Americans over the past 30 years. 40% of married people said they were “very happy,” while only 24% of unmarried people, divorced people, and separated said they were happy.
Professor Seligman does not really believe in the relationship between marriage and happiness, because he believes that happy people are more likely to make friends and get along with each other, so it is easier to approach marriage.
But he also said frankly that in the survey of people who are very happy, the happiest top 10% of people almost have close life partners, only one person does not.
Another finding is that the correlation between physical health and happiness in the objective sense has just reached a significant level (that is, the correlation is small), and the correlation is our subjective perception of our health status.
Survey data also show that people with religious beliefs are happier and happier in life than atheists.
10. The true meaning of happiness: forget the past, seize the present. Why do people hold on to the past hatred?
Why is it not our nature to rewrite unfortunate history?
In fact, forgiveness can turn pain, hatred into neutral or even positive emotions, which can increase life satisfaction.
Remember, “You can’t hurt the perpetrator without forgiving him, but forgiveness can set you free.
Among the three rules of happiness listed by Professor Martin Seligman, grasping the present happiness is the most important.
The fast pace of modern life and the extreme future mentality of modern people will make us forget the present.
All the technological advances, from the telephone to the Internet, are good for you to do more, to extend, to save time so that we can plan for the future, but saving time and planning for the future has made us lose the present.
There is a little trick to seize the happiness now: make surprises.
To surprise yourself often, it is better to create surprises with the people around you. This surprise does not have to be a dozen roses. A sudden cup of coffee may be effective.
It’s worth spending five minutes a day planning to surprise your spouse, child, or colleague.